Play is a dial, not a switch

It is a weird time to be an advocate for play.

I'm currently preparing the pre-recorded segments of my workshop for the Forma Conference, and I must admit to some cognitive dissonance.

"How am I going to help formation leaders encourage adults to play right now?" is the question I'm sitting with.

However you voted, there's a good chance it doesn't naturally feel like a time for frivolity. To be honest, that goes double in our household at the moment, as we deal in a deeply personal way with a devastating health diagnosis in our extended family that is going to have real implications for our day-to-day lives.

There are a million answers to this quandary, of course. Yes, joy is a form of resistance to tyranny and injustice. Yes, a controlled dose of good old fashioned escapism is sometimes helpful and necessary amid adversity.

But the answer I want to develop just a smidge this morning—before a couple of commercial announcements below—is more fundamentally connected to the essence of play. And it is especially relevant to this question about fostering adult play amid un- or anti-playful cultures and settings.

Getting adults to play, I am convinced, does not mean getting them to assent to "press go" on fun and privolity. Would you like to play a game? Y/N

Getting adults to play is about taking one step, cracking one joke, getting egged into taking just one jump-shot that just might turn into full-blown garbage can basketball.

I kid you not: As I am writing this in my favored coffee shop, a toddler has started making eyes at me from across the room. I have responded in kind by hiding behind my laptop screen and reappearing with silly faces, as is meet and right. I am still writing a little missive to y'all, but this little boy has helped me dial up the fun just a smidge.

Certain people are masters of this kind of modulation. I marvel at the playful dexterity of friend of mine who can instantly diffuse a tense moment among bickering kids who are positively itching to escalate their preschooler slights and grievances. Of course he does it with a playful outburst: a strategic tickle here, a tactical catchphrase there—deployed in his astonishingly good Kermit the Frog voice.

I'll have lots to say at Forma about helping adult learners let their hair down during Christian formation activities. But the best advice I can give is this:

Don't invite them to play a game, especially if you're just starting out at working this kind of culture change. For I say unto thee that the onset of play is not unlike the in-breaking of the Kingdom of God.

Just smile and make the first move. Even a fleeting moment of playfulness can set the tone for what follows, in a way that will make all the difference.

**

Commercial Announcement #1

A couple months back I recorded a conversation with my old pals at Learning Forte about some practical aspects of faith leadership amid what they're calling the "advent" of AI. It was released this week, and I was relieved and encouraged by how well the conversation has held up. I hope you'll have a listen!

Commercial Announcement #2

I will be eternally grateful for the support I received from the Episcopal Church Foundation when I decided to go back to grad school. It's not an exaggeration to say that I probably wouldn't have accepted the offer to matriculate at Teachers College without it.

Well, it's application season in the ECF Fellowship Partners Program, and I'd like to encourage anyone with academic or innovative ministry ambitions to consider this program. Here are the talking points from ECF:

• We Empower the Next Generation. Applicants are asked to describe how they will be developing the next generation of leaders for The Episcopal Church, whether in the context of a local congregation, through a church-wide initiative, or in another setting.
• Our Support Goes Beyond Funding. Awards typically range up to $15,000 for the first year, with renewals available for up to two additional years. New Fellows also join a vibrant network of past Fellows and ECF partners, connecting with peers and mentors across the Church.
• The Selection Process is Rigorous. Because we take this commitment seriously, the Fellowship application process is highly competitive and requires thorough preparation. The deadline to apply is March 11, 2025, and the selected Fellows will be announced in June 2025.

Fully cosigned on all counts! Please do consider me on offer to talk through your interest if you'd like to learn more.